She was standing at a corner, chatting animatedly with her girlfriends. The first thing, you noticed about her was how she swayed her long golden hair.
Her beauty mesmerized you. There was no way you were going home without her contacts. Trembling, you approached her table – where she was having a margarita. You ordered another round. Later you asked for her number as she was leaving.
Now, you are confused about how to make her obsessed with you and what to text the girl you met to make her want you. But before that let’s see what the purpose of texting is.
What’s the purpose of texting a woman/girl?
The main goal of texting a girl is to keep the interest she had on you (when she first gave you her number) to follow up and get her to meet you in person again. To do that you need to obsess her (drive her crazy – in a good way) with texting .
1. Pursuing a girl fills many guys with apprehension.
Let’s be real. The biggest fear for most guys is being rejected by a girl you are madly in love with. But, with the right strategy, you can win her over – especially through text. If she is slowly losing interest then you need to turn the tables.
Remember you are not the only guy pursuing her. So, here goes the best strategy for getting that girl to fall over heels for you.
2. Do not delay texting
This is the part where most guys get it wrong. If a girl gives you her number she expects you to text/call as soon as possible. If you take long, then she figures you were joking or lack the confidence to pursue her. If you got her number through a friend or at a party you should first introduce yourself.
If she is super-hot as you keep telling the boys then she probably has many suitors and your name may not show up on her radar. For example, text her, “Hi, am Marvin. We met at Julian’s birthday party last night…”
Just text her the next day (most women feel more comfortable by texting them the following day) or on the same night if you prefer to. Just do not make the mistakes that most guys do, letting her wait. Delay 3-5 days and miss the change!
The reason a girl will become obsessed with a certain guy is that he has something that is not found in other guys. It could be his voice, how he treats her, or some special gift that keeps her intrigued.
You should extend this originality even when texting. Don’t simply draft texts that are a cliché. Be witty, charming and creative in your texts and she will look forward to having conversations with you.
4. Ending conversations
Here is another secret that you should wear on your sleeve. The person who ends the conversation is the one leading the conversation. Don’t be the needy guy who will continue texting her with no replies even after she has gone to bed. Actually according to research 60% of desperate & needy men, result into flakiness and will never have the chance to gain her heart.
Make your text short and to the point. Occasionally, become busy. This will create anticipation on the part of the girl and she will start craving your texts. When you become the one who ends the conversation, you appear scarce and in demand. She will seek not to lose you.
5. Go M.I.A (missing in action) in the middle of texting
Instead of instantaneously replying to every one of her texts, occasionally go silent when in the middle of a conversation. This will turn the tables and she will be the one checking her phone for any replies.
It also eliminates you looking needy. However, do not also take too long to reply to her texts as she might start assuming you do not have time for her.
6. Spelling errors
Unless you are in 3rd grade, avoid those short abbreviations like “str8t, gnte…” they make you look immature. Good communication is vital for the success of the relationship.
This does not mean you should not spice up your message with a few abbreviations like, “ouch, ooww, krazy e.t.c” Also, do overcapitalize all your texts and words. This is a text, not a thesis. Loosen up a bit.
The point is you should re-read your texts before sending them.
7. Ask questions
One sure way to keep your conversations flowing is to ask her questions. When you ask a question, it signifies that you are also waiting for an answer. This forces her to respond to your text in an effort not to appear rude. Questions about her day or what she plans to do during the weekend are great when you are starting out texting.
Avoid cliché questions like, “are you asleep? “or “have you eaten?” The question that you ask should not be one that can be responded to in one sentence. If you ask her how the concert was last night, kindly press her for more details.
There are some kinds of questions that are not appropriate to be asked over text, or simply will not trigger her and make things worse.
– What’s your relationship like with your family?
– Are you looking for your soulmate?
– Are you looking for something serious?
Try to make your questions sound more fun and interesting. So, here are some example texts you can send and increase the changes of a woman to want you more.
(a) THE ONE THING QUESTIONS
Q: If you could only [ACTION/ITEM/THING] 1 for the rest of your life, what would that be?
Instead of asking “What kind of music do you like listening to?” Use the following format.
If you could only [ACTION/ITEM/THING] 1 for the rest of your life, what would that be?
So a more interesting question could be “If you could only listen to 1 musical genre, what would that be? Would that be jazz?”
Q: What one thing would you save if your house was on fire/flood?
By asking this you are trying to explore and find out her priorities and the values in life. Once you know more on what is important to her, you will get more and more into her world.
Make sure to be a good listener. Listening skills is important when you are face to face with a person, but also when you text each other. Women like to talk about themselves and guys who listen and understand their thoughts.
Q: Who was your celebrity (actor, singer etc..) crush when you were younger?
Again a good question to learn more about her. You never know perhaps there is a match.
(b) A OR B QUESTIONS
Questions with two options to choose from have a better chance to get an answer. These types of questions are a great way to encourage a response. Like in marketing the less options you give the more change is to have to close the deal. Questions with unlimited answers can lead into no answer at all. If you ask a question that she really has to think about, it will be uncomfortable for her.
Here are some formula examples:
Q: BIG or Small [ITEM/ACTION]?
E.g. Big car or small car?
Q: [ANIMAL A] or [ANIMAL B]?
Eg. Cat or Horse?
Q: [FOOD A] or [FOOD B]?
Eg. Pasta or Sushi?
Q: [BIG CITY A] or [SMALL TOWN]?
Eg. New York or Bandon, Oregon town by the sea?
Q: [EXOTIC COUNTRY A] or [OTHER BEAUTIFUL DESTINATION]?
Eg. Maldives or Norway?
When she answers A or B, keep asking more related questions like “why” and let her talk and express her feelings.
8. Be flirtatious
No girl likes a guy who takes life too seriously. Flirting shows that you desire to be more than friends. Do not overdo it but use it occasionally – especially when she is in a good mood. Use emoticons, be playful in your replies and at the right moment tease her a bit. Sprinkle your words with a bit of compliment but ensure that they are honest and not just intended to get her to bed.
Now that she’s obsessed with you, it’s time to get her to chase you.
Flirty questions to ask a girl over text
Your goal is to see you as the attractive guy she needs to have in her life and not just a friend. By sending flirting texts you can actually avoid the friend zone and sending her the message that you don’t see her as a friend.
Q: What do you do in your free time other than stalk my Instagram?
This will make her both shock and laugh. Imagine she was for real checking your Instagram many times, what will she think when you straightly ask her. Even though she didn’t check any of your social profiles, this text gives her the message that it’s her she has to chase you, not you! In addition it’s an open up question where she can share anything she wants too (something that is important about her life etc).
9. Remember she is nervous too
The problem when you try too much to impress a girl is that you go overboard and over-text. Since some blog told you that you need to be funny, you overdo it and have cliché jokes every time you text her. This comes as unimaginative.
Relax and be yourself. Remember if she is into you, she is probably as nervous as you are. There is also no perfect way to text as people have varying personalities. Lastly, avoid sending her those long texts that take minutes to read.
The best advice when it comes texting a beautiful woman, is to simply have fun with it, and learn through the process. Learn how to play with her mind. Women love reading romance novels because of the romance and the more *spicy* things inside.
The worst advice you can hear is to send random text messages at any time. In addition asking boring questions, or unpolished messages would make things even worse.
It is the dream of many guys to have girls chasing after them. However, you need a strategy for this to happen. If the girl notices that you are insecure, needy and too nice then you may lose her to the hulk bodied guy. Whenever, you get a number from a girl, ensure that you text her as soon as possible. Delaying shows a lack of interest or low confidence levels.
Be playful, humorous and at times delay a bit before replying to her text. Keep the conversations flowing by asking her questions that do not require and one-sentence reply. Do not over text her as it implies you are insecure. Many girls will have several guys texting them at the same time, and the alpha male is the one who wins the spoils.
When texting ensure that you leave her in suspense by not revealing too many details. This leaves her with anticipation as to your next text. With the right strategy, you will not only have one girl obsessed with you but many.