Love is a feeling that all human craves. When you are in a relationship with the girl of your dreams, you feel like you are on the mountaintop. But, when things go south, you simply lose the strength to live.
Instead of wallowing in self-pity, you can re-invent yourself and get that girl back. Texting your ex-girlfriend is more complicated than texting a new girl you met at the party.
Firstly, you both were in a relationship where trust was broken. She probably shared very intimate details with you and is probably hurting from the breakup. In this case, you need to tread carefully. If you appear too needy, then she will turn you down fast.
1. Communication Blackout
It is tempting to text your ex-girlfriend in the middle of the night when you are super drunk. But, this only makes you appear needy and desperate. You get the same result when you test her when you are sad. The tendency at this point is to engage in self-pity. Women like confident men.
The moment you become desperate, she starts avoiding you like a plague.
Admit that you are also grieving. This is the perfect opportunity to heal your broken heart. You should break the no-contact policy when you realize that your ex-girlfriend is hurting from a current loss like losing a loved one or a job.
2. First Texts
Your chances of getting back with your girl will also be determined by your timing. If you text her late at night when she is trying to get some sleep after a long day’s work then she might ignore or block you. You can break the ice by texting her to remind her of something that she likes doing.
If there is an exhibition that is coming up and your ex-girlfriend goes every year, you can start the conversation by reminding of it. During your first text, let it not appear that you are seeking her back. Text her like you would a friend. Sample text will include, “congratulations on the new addition to your family” or “Hi, I heard that you got a promotion. Congratulations, you deserve it.”
3. Avoid Talking About The Relationship
If you had broken up it is tempting to want things to go back to the way they were. When texting, try not to mention your old relationship. This will mean abandoning pet names you used to call each other. Start out as friends first, then as you re-ignite the old flames you can be casual.
4. Be Respectful
When texting an ex-girlfriend who you want back then be respectful at all times. Do not appear pushy. This will include having a mentality of positivity. If you are in a happy mood, share the smile with her. There will be moments you will be flooded with emotion or hatred towards her for breaking up with you but you need to have control of your emotions and be respectful in all your communications.
5. Figure Out What Went Wrong
Most of the times guys will not know what they did wrong to necessitate a breakup. Finding out what you did wrong will help you in changing the old bad habits. Having a scarcity mentality makes you weak, needy and weakens your image as a confident man. Guys who are excessively needy will text unnecessarily. If you are this kind of guy, then you need to work on your personality.
Find a new hobby that lets you exercise your strengths. You can become more confident through daily affirmations. Exercise and change your dressing style. This will help in creating a more confident you. Your ex-girlfriend will notice this and probably come looking for you.
6. Get To The Point Fast
After breaking the ice with your ex-girlfriend, and having become her friend it is time you get to the point as to why you are pursuing her.
You need to be clear that you want her back and you made mistakes in the past. Instead of making boring texts, be playful with her. Tease occasionally without going overboard.
If she is still reserved as to opening her space to you, then give her time. Being playful will help you rekindle your romance and get her to your side.
7. Do Not Overate Her
The reason most guys become desperate for a girl is that they are only viewing her from her best side. Girls make mistakes too and some have very dark sides. As long as she is human she is still going to have weaknesses. The moment you look at her as a composition of strengths and weaknesses, then it helps you text soberly.
8. Build An Emotional Connection
It is true women are more tuned to their emotional side than men. If you seriously want to win her back through text, you need to carefully listen to her emotional needs and find ways to meet them.
If she needs a shoulder to cry on when the boss shouts at her or one of her girlfriends’ breakups with her then she needs to know that you have her back. When a girl knows that she has an emotional connection to you, she is willing to invest more in the relationship than start afresh.
It is tempting to visit a psychologist whenever you have a relationship problem. But, counselors do not come cheap. The Magic of making up course is a fast tool to get your girl back without draining your pockets in the process.
The relationship was meant to last forever. You dreamed of growing old together. But, a few months down the line, you are not on speaking terms. Getting your girl back can feel like climbing a mountain. But, if you have the right strategy when drafting texts, then she will come chasing after you. One of the key things you need to avoid is coming out as too desperate.
This is where most guys go wrong. They will bombard a girl they have just broken up with numerous texts, one after another. This smells of neediness. Take some time off before you make that first text. This shows her that you can still leave without her. While in the process, re-invent yourself. Buy yourself some new clothes, a new haircut, or engage in some muscle-building exercises.