It is not unusual to fall in love with someone who is hitched. Maybe you have noticed how her current boyfriend treats her and you think she can do better. However, having a girl leave her current boyfriend is not easy – especially when she is head over heels over the guy.
This does not mean you should give up. With the right strategy, you two should soon be an item. Firstly, not all relationships mature to the full term and lead to marriage. So, you still have a shot with her if you are smart enough. The strategies I will prescribe will require patience and persistence – which I am sure you have. When trying to get her attention, make every effort not to appear as needy.
Let’s get started… Is the girl interested in you?
This is the first question you need to ascertain before making a move on her. If she has no interest in dating you then no matter what you do, it will be impossible to change her mind. The only way to know is to be visible whenever she is around.
Watch out whether she makes eye contact, laughs at your jokes, remembers your name, or looks for opportunities to be with you. The more she opens up to you the better it is in developing trust.
Turn her to a friend
Before you can start any intimate relationship with her, first try making her your friend. Most ladies are on high alert when a guy approaches them. They are wary that you do not want something in return. That you’re trying to spend time with them is masked with hidden intentions.
Building trust will require patience and lots of honesty. You can start by inviting her for group nights or parties. Being her friend helps you evaluate whether the relationship is worth pursuing. It also gives you an opportunity to learn more about her interests and hobbies. Friendships lay the foundation for intimate relationships.
Your advantage over current boyfriend
If she is going to leave her boyfriend for you, then you have to offer something better. After making her your friend, she will start opening up on her concerns with the current relationship. This gives you an opportunity to be the reverse. If she complains that the current boyfriend does not listen to her, start making an effort to be a good listener.
This is a matter of using the boyfriend’s weaknesses to your advantage. With time she will start comparing the two of you and even decide that you are the better option. Avoid stalking her. If you are going to win her trust avoid speaking ill of her boyfriend. Always condemning her boyfriend means that she made a wrong decision and it can at times backfire on you.
Give her your full attention
If the opportunity arises for you two to be together, ensure that you are in a place with minimal distractions. This will also mean putting your phone on silent. The only way for a girl to know that you value her is by giving her your full attention.
Ask her questions about her family or workplace and listen with interest in her response. Be respectful when she does not want to talk about her boyfriend. To keep the conversations flowing do not focus on what you are going to say next but try to respond to what she is saying.
For you to move from the friend zone to a place of intimacy is by opening up. Engage her on some of your fears, hopes, and dreams. This gives your girl an opportunity to know you better. Vulnerability also means you are in touch with your emotions and that you are not stone cold-hearted.
It is okay to watch an emotional movie and shed a tear or two. It just shows that you are human. Once you become vulnerable, you also let her be emotional with you. This helps in creating a special connection that may lead to a long-term relationship.
Finding opportunities to give her a compliment
Women love honest compliments. Ladies love to hear that they look good and smell like fresh roses. Do not overdo it. Giving her compliments passes the message that you are concerned about her and that you value her.
In most relationships, you will find that the current boyfriend used to shower her with compliments when dating but as the relationship progressed, it stopped. In this regard, she will find every opportunity to spend more time with you.
Drop hints that you are interested in her
To avoid being friend-zoned, drop some subtle hints that you want to be more than her friend. She may not reciprocate during the initial days, but she will mellow to you after you have created an emotional connection.
Try to make skin contact and observe her reaction. Next, hold her hand when walking and if she does not show discomfort then it means she sees you more than just a friend. Do not pressure her, when she thinks it is the right time to ditch her boyfriend for you, she will do it.
Having a girl leave her boyfriend for you is a long shot but it does happen – especially when the guy is acting like a jerk. However, you need to tread carefully. Showering the girl with gifts will not go unnoticed and the jilted boyfriend may come after you, leaving you engaged in battles you should not have happened in the first place.
If you want this to work out, you need a solid strategy that presents you like the better option. The girl needs to figure out that she is better off dating you. For this to happen, you need to up your confidence levels. Also, change your wardrobe, it will make you more attractive to the girl.
But, the ultimate guide to winning her to your side is to have an emotional connection. The moment the girl realizes that she can share intimate things with you and trust you then your chances of you making her your girlfriend is very high.