How To Approach A Girl In A Club

by Andreas | Last Updated: August 31, 2019
Affiliate Disclaimer: As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases made on our website. If you make a purchase through links from this website, we may get a small share of the sale from Amazon and other similar affiliate programs.

Unlike out here, when it is day time and everyone is wearing their poker faces, approaching ladies in the nightclub can be a bit of a gamble. I spend numerous nights out, and even I know it is never a guarantee I’ll walk out like a boss. However, I’ve navigated the waters long enough to improve my odds way more than many guys.

I don’t mind being a brag, but I’ll admit my charm has a lot to do with my success rate. Interestingly, I wasn’t always this cocky in my younger years; I was a lot more awkward with girls. If you gave me a beer back then, I’d probably find you an unpleasant human being!

Years, muscle, and no acne later, I feel unrecognizable even to myself, and it all started with confidence. It doesn’t matter if you lack the charm or the looks. You’ll need a lot of confidence if you want to approach a girl in a club and not end up looking like a fool.

I’ll be honest; if you are new at club life, approaching a girl may be a little difficult for you the first few times (you might find it easier to approach a girl at work). But you’re here to learn, and you’re in the right place. By the end of this article, you’ll know how to increase your chances and adapt fast.

How To Approach A Girl In The Club

attract a girl at club

Your success with girls at a nightclub can be a hit or miss. The loud music, the noise, drunken states, interesting and fashion, and lowered inhibitions will give you an unpredictable crowd. But you can still win with these main tips:


Before you take your first steps or say your first words to a girl you are eyeing, your overall appearance creates the first impression. Remember it’s loud, many personalities are lurking around, and it’s only normal that the girl will give you a quick look to judge what kind of man you are. Your body and the image you portray are doing the talking the minute you enter the club.

Here, women can judge whether they’ll sleep with you or not in as little as five seconds. You need to look good (hygiene, grooming, and style), feel good, and look confident. By exuding self-confidence, you’ll make it easier for yourself when you find a girl you want to approach.

Approach Anxiety can keep you single for YEARS! (It get me until I “decided” to overcome it..) 


confident man fixing tie

Now, self-confidence doesn’t mean being downright cocky and annoying. Not unless you’ve already established contact and you’ve noticed she does have a thing for that. Self-confidence means understanding you will be turned down often.

Some women aren’t interested in male company. Other women will do it just because they can. Many women think you could be a psycho and that they should turn you down hard.

Still, that doesn’t suggest giving up. Many men get successful in the end; you just have to go at it until you learn the ropes and get that girl. You’ll have to learn to take rejection well and develop a thick skin – you’ll get better with each attempt.

Work Your Strengths

Are you a good dancer? Step on the dance floor and girls will come to you. If you’re charming and good at persuasion, find the quieter parts of the club; like the bar, lounge or lobby.

picture of a cocktail

Not a great dancer or a charmer? Build that powerful body language and let your body do the talking. When girls are drunk, up for fun, and feeling wild, your masculine presence will definitely attract someone to you. Are you a fun guy? Work with that.

The more women notice how genuinely fun you are with friends and other people, the more responsive they will be to your advances!

The Approach

beautiful girl dancing in a club looking at you

Don’t overthink it. When you make eye contact with a girl you like, don’t look confused and don’t hesitate. Walk over to her. One technique that helps my approach is matching my energy with theirs.

Looks like she’s having fun? Smile and match that – maintain the strong body language, throw in a genuine compliment, and introduce yourself. It’s as simple as that!

Final Word

Confidence is a huge part of the nightclub experience. If I’m completely honest, I took some time getting to the level I’m at today. Thanks to resources like Supreme Self Confidence, I was able to fight my social anxiety, believe I deserved a lot more than I what I resigned myself to and developed emotional maturity as well.

Andreas, the founder of CharmingMale, is an enthusiast of becoming a "charming guy" without becoming someone else. He has been an average skinny dude most of his life, yet after years of hustle, disappointments, he become a better male version of himself. He discovered that, even if you are an average guy, as long as you are willing to put in some effort of improving yourself and developing the skills, you can become a better man that people will respect and admire!